I used to believe my greatest strength as an HR leader was that I was approachable. My door was always open. My tone was warm. My responses were measured. People described me as diplomatic and steady. I wore those adjectives like badges of honor. I thought that was leadership. What I did not understand at the time was that I had confused approachability with avoidance. I believed that protecting relationships meant minimizing discomfort. I believed that being supportive meant softening hard truths. I believed that if no one left a room upset, I had done my job well. In reality, I was protecting myself from difficult conversations. It took one leader and a very expensive lesson to make me see that clearly.
